Manchmal kommt alles zusammen

Ich wollte heute basteln. Nur darf man Kleber nicht schütteln. Ich weiß das schon, aber ich wollte es trotzdem mal wieder wissen. Da ist so ein hartnäckiger Kleber der noch mit Flitter gespickt ist und irgendwie immer nicht will. Den hab ich also geschüttelt, dazu hörte ich eine Kindergeschichte (jaja, ich hab viele davon auf dem Handy..).  Irgendwelche Kinder spielten (nein kämpften) gerade mit Gnomen und Kobolden, natürlich mit kindlichen Mitteln.   Als ich gerade so richtig am schütteln war, sagte der Sprecher: “und der Glibber verteilte sich überall hin, es klebte so richtig und füllte alles aus… sie hatten es überall an den Fingern und versuchten, das Zeug wieder loszuwerden…” – man kann sich denken was kommt, oder? Der grüne Glibber sprang aus der Klebeflasche und verteilte sich überall hin….und ich versuchte, während der Sprecher meine Lage schilderte, das grüne Klebezeugs wieder von den Fingern und vom Tisch zu bekommen…. hahahaha.

Mir passiert dauernd sowas.  9ERTHBNCE

What I understand as dignity

Dignity is:

 

  • when you leave me the way I am
  • when you leave me be
  • when you stop hurting me
  • when you stop telling me better
  • when you stop making war to me
  • when you stop inflicting me with your problems over the top
  • when you stop saying no to me
  • when you start accepting me
  • when we make love to each other
  • when we can let go of each other
  • when I can have something to eat
  • when I can have the same rights as you have
  • when you stop hurting my family only because I did not do as you told me
  • when you stop telling me what to do
  • when you stop making ads about things I will never need
  • when I am free
  • when I can see the blue sky
  • when I can breathe
  • when I can have company
  • when I can do what I prefer
  • when I can be the gender I want to be or need to be
  • when I won’t get hurt over who I am
  • when I accept others
  • when I can have a country without war
  • when something is in order, without a hole in it
  • when you want holes in something and are allowed to
  • when somebody wants to swim against the tide and is not hold back
  • when I get smiled at
  • when I am consoled by someone
  • when I am allowed to cry
  • when I am allowed to scream
  • when I am allowed to say otherwise
  • when I am allowed to think otherwise
  • when I am allowed to keep my thinking for myself
  • when I am not touched
  • when I ask for more touching
  • when I ask for company and nobody goes away
  • when I get attention
  • when I get the ears of someone important to a special subject
  • when I am listened to
  • when I get people to read my stuff
  • when I am ignored by people who hate me since I then have my freedom and peace
  • when I am allowed to go to church
  • when I don’t want to go to church and am allowed  to without getting hurt
  • when I don’t want to have a religion
  • when I need my religion to survive and nobody says something against it
  • when people accept each other.

Continue reading What I understand as dignity

Würde habe ich nicht mehr…

Die Würde des Menschen ist unantastbar.

 

Manche Menschen wissen das nicht. 

Besonders wenn sie Beamte sind, so wie die, die ich regelmäßig treffen muss weil man mich dazu zwingt.

Ebensowenig diejenigen, die mich von der guten Schule

runtergemobbt haben

und jetzt sehr wahrscheinlich in guten Positionen sitzen.

Und auch nicht die, die immer Krieg führen möchten.

Auch nicht die Männer, die mich nur als Druckausgleich benutzt haben.

Die Würde des Menschen ist UNANTASTBAR!!!!!

Merkt Euch das endlich.

 

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Of Prostitutes and Black holes

Today I feel like a black hole. No, more like a prostitute. Because, this is probably the same. Prostitutes take the sorrows of “normal”, societyish probably wealthy men, and turn it into a nothingness so these men can relax and forget about them, but after it is done, the men forget about the prostitutes as well as their sorrows, hence the black hole, since everything just vanishes like never there.

The prostitute is forgotten, the sorrow is forgotten, and on it goes, with normal life and earning a heap of money and turning back to the women, who are worthy of their deep love and understanding and their sperm and their time and their life.

The prostitute does not even know if this ever happened and she never even feels like she was worth to ever have been count. She goes on, swallowing and eating some others huge information about the past, until it is completely gone inside her, never to be seen again. And on an on and on, since there is just dark space and her as heavy and massy as possible, until even time is forgotten from the whole dark space around her and inside her.

That is what makes prostitutes and black holes all the same.

The men can act as there weren’t ever any prostitutes in their lives, because they vanish like a black hole, because obviously, a black hole must vanish in the end, when everything around it is dark due to it eating everything in “thereness”. So, the black hole never existed, it can’t be told at least.  Or at last, who can ever tell.

Contemplating life… on a sunny day

Again, I woke up, thinking and trying hard to understand, what life is.

Feeling so inefficient and bored and unhappy and wrong in race and wrong as a woman, with no kids and no dreams to come true anymore. Yeah, life sucks. And lost a country on my mindmap whatsoever even more.

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