If I could get it
if you talk in positive ways to me
or in negative ways
I could possibly understand
and write in positive
or best
I don’t know I simply don’t know



I don’t even know what I did
to work you so up
why do I write at all
maybe I just am too stupid
for understanding…. ?
I am beyond catching up

but I’m not there…
although I followed my heart
it did not make me happy
or anyone else. ♥


I hate my life

Well. To write this is unnecessary, and yet I do it. I hate my life, and everybody knows it. Does not know my life, really almost nobody knows me, although I met hundreds and thousands of people in my life, but nobody stayed in my life so far… They only know my life is unworthy. I am not worth much, and I don’t really am a person, that should be here in this era, this world or at all to be.
To write here does not really make sense, since you can see me, so what use is my writing? I just feel so lost, so lonely and so hopeless. But you know that already….
Everything is so dark.